Hey Mr. Groundhog -- Get It Right This Year (Please!)

January 30, 2011
By: O. J. Cunningham

I don't know about you but I've had it up to here with the recent cold snap.

There have been way too many single digit numbers appearing in the Weather Channel's "Weather on the 8's" for our viewing area during the month of January.


But as we all know, it's almost that time of year again . . . time for the furry groundhog to poke his head out of his hole in some odd-named city in Pennsylvania and announce (to Bill Murray) whether or not spring is close at hand or still another six weeks down the road.

Here's the The Full Scoop on GroundHog Day from the Storm Fax Weather Almanac web site.

After a few hours of snow shoveling last week, I shivered back into my warm house, sipped some hot coffee to get the blood to return to my fingers and pondered (that's what people that write columns for on-line newspapers call it) the question . . . Why do we really live in Michigan?

You may be surprised to find out that there are darn few reasons that come to mind when pondering -- especially if your face is frozen, your butt is as cold as a penguin's bottom sitting on an ice cube and your ears are the color of pickled beet-juice.

Nonetheless, I came up with a short list during a recent pondering.

Fire - There is no way to describe the warmth of a fireplace (to someone in balmy Florida - even if it's your golf-playing Hall of Fame buddy Bob Darbee - who cleverly transports himself to FLORIDA -- where it's warm -- while the rest of his friends barely survive winter) after coming in from the cold. Did I type that out loud?

I hope that doesn't sound too bitter. Let me "ponder" on.

Whining - From mid-December through late February, there's nothing better than whining to friends and family members about the bitter cold. What would we possibly talk about if we didn't have the bitter cold, poor driving conditions, high heating bills and wind chill to whine about.

Ice - You can't walk across the Saginaw River in August. From March to November in our little corner of the world, you have to use the bridges to travel from East Side to West Side in Bay City. But in the Winter . . . oh yeah, baby . . . we can walk across the ice to get to the other side.

Seasons - An old philosopher once said, "You have to walk through the freezing blizzard to appreciate the warmth of the summer sun." Think about it for just a minute. Do we really appreciate the warmth of summer more because we have frozen tushies in January?

Trout - I enjoy fishing for trout. I always thought that you had to have 4 seasons to have great trout fishing. Some yuppie fly fisherman on Channel 35 (Outdoor) always says, "Trout don't live in ugly places." Recently, I found out that there is a lovely trout population in Arkansas. Perhaps, no one has offered our trout the opportunity to relocate.

Clothing - Look in your closet. Go there right now. Separate all your clothing into two piles - warm weather and cold weather. Which pile is bigger? Exact-a-mundo! If we didn't have sub-zero temperatures and life-threatening wind chills, what would we do with that big pile of dark, itchy apparel?

Pasty White Skin - I'm proud of my mid-Michigan, pasty, white coloration. I think I look pretty hot in white, colorless skin . . . especially my legs. Each year, I try to take a mid-winter trip to southern Florida where I can put on my summer shorts for a week and wow all the beach babes as I do my impersonation of Casper the Friendly Ghost.

Kids' Snowsuits - What would parents do if they couldn't dress their kids to go outdoors in the middle of winter? How would mothers spend their afternoons? It must take two to three hours each day getting little kids dressed and undressed after and before a 15-minute dash into the Michigan winter.

(Lastly) Outdoor Sports - They don't ice fish in ugly places!

On February 2, all eyes will be on Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. For those of you keeping track, Phil has seen his shadow 10 of the last 11 years since 2000. Only once (2007) was there "no shadow." Here's a complete Groundhog Day History

Phil better get it right this year.